The Life of Wighar Stamfaste

Post Surgery

So yesterday I went in to the local hospital to have my frenulum repaired, that is the tiny bit of skin between the foreskin and glands, the back story to this is that i woke up one night with painful feeling in my crotch, apparently the skin had dryed somehow the penis had placed it self rather badly and the foreskin was pulled when i twisted in my sleep that cracked the frenulum.

I visited the urologist to consultation, the urologist was a man that barely spoke swedish and he hasted alot so there wasnt much information shared, basicly i was told that it was no problem this could be fixed by a surgeon, so I went in yesterday at 07:30 the old urologist apparently had left and thankfully a urologist was swedish toke a look to explain how they were to repair the frenulum, but he informed me that my foreskin was extremly tight and was suprised it was not mentioned at my earlier visit, best course of action was Circumcision, operation went smoothly no problems at all, and now here I sit with a pain in the crouch that will take a month to solidly heal, I may not have any intercourse for a month, well thats easy I dont have a girlfriend and I am still a virgin so thats no problem really.

Going to the bathroom is different I have no sense of aim now and the numbness is pretty scary to thought, I had a panic attack last night when the preasure gave me pain as I had an erection like men do during night which is pretty natural, I so do hate having panic attacks

Anyway let’s get on to another topic.

2011 the year of SWTOR?

So they say that Star Wars The Old Republic will be release sometime before summer 2011, I am fine with waiting really, I hope they spend the time fixing bugs and compatability issues, I am a bit of the information train myself, I have yet to read anything on how Crafting will be in the game and if there will be a player housing system and how such system is developed if implimented in final release.

So many questions running a cross my mind… Teräs Käsi, Echanii, Adegha…. so many questions, gah nvm, lets move on.

Nihongo desu ka

Yes indeed, Do you speak Japanese?

I myself have some minor knowledge, yet I do not believe I myself could perform any everyday watercooler talk or such, I do have some education materials to read and listen to so I may learn a bit more when I have time to read and listen to them with dedication.

Dedication is a problem at the moment cause I have so much else to do at the moment, though I will in the comming year listen to the education CD’s while playing games, this worked when I listened to audio books earlier which I now still remember most of it.

I’ll end my post here and hope that you the read enjoy reading it.
(PS: Ill fix the spelling later, i typed it fast and wasnt thinking of my spelling)

Left 4 Dead 2 – The Versus Mode

During the last 2 weeks I have gone from playing normal campaign mode in Left 4 Dead 2 to the Versus mode, which I never tried in left 4 Dead so I thought it was worth to at least try it.
I must confess I love playing as the Infected, most of all I like to freak the survivors by being the Hunter, moving around them out of sight and crouching to make the hunter growling sound and sometimes pounce around an area just so they hear the attack scream close by, or I pounce right into the center and jump around among them before going for my target.

The Spitter and Boomer are a brutal combo when setting up a ambush, have the Boomer vomit on them or get in among them to cover them all in bile when he/she blows up, and while the horde of zombies come from all over a perfect spit will make life hard for the poor survivors, if your lucky one of them will be knocked over.
The Charger can make instant death possible in some areas, as the Charger makes his charge your either stuck infront of the running train accident to happened or your thrown away to the side, if extremely unlucky your thrown into deep water, which means instant death in most cases.

As I got bored of the constant bad ping on servers I decided to do what I used to do before, I used to administrate dedicated game server, so checking that I had so I could afford it on my own hand finding that I could indeed squeeze it in for less than expected, I ordered a 8 slot(s) Left 4 Dead 2 Server from interactive 3D, I have been a customer with i3D for sometime and almost all of my game server rentals has been with them, mostly due to low ping and helpful customer service.
At the moment I am trying to figure out why the server wont accept my orders to go into versus mode only, if I cant figure it out I’ll contact customer support.
I made some new friends on the versus course and I am happy to get invites to games when possible, that is if I don’t check the friends column for games their in.

Parts of my history and on subject of love
recently one could read that The Gamer’s Girl got her engagement ring, Congratulations ^_^ I am happy for her.

I do wish I had a girlfriend myself, but as I mentioned in my blog earlier I have a unknown panic attack syndrome, claustrophobia and agoraphobia among the few.

I guess I can write about it as I am pretty open in my blog anyways..

When I was around 4 years old I believe it was I was approached now and then by a bit older kids say like 6 – 9 years of age, asking if I was the younger brother of OB (I will refer to my older brother as OB for Older Brother from here on), of course I answered truthfully that yes I am OB’s younger brother and they began to ask if he was stupid or strange, (He has Dyslexia, which at that time wasn’t so well known as is now) of course as it was my brother they were bad mouthing I was offended that they talked badly about my brother, and this got me into fights and general discomfortable situations.

Now years afterwards I believe this to be a reason why I had such a bad social knowledge, when i began in preschool some began to tease me cause at this stage the previous problems had made me easy to anger and situations often got problematic…

The year I turned 7 I started school and had no knowledge of what was awaited of me or how things would turn out, the class was like 25 students in a small class room and me with claustrophobia and the presence of so many new faces and some which I remember that bullied me during preschool…
I was in that school for only 2 weeks, they had to evacuate me cause they jumped me on the playground, stole my shoes and threw them on the roof and as memory serves someone poured his food inside my shirt during lunch, a small fight broke out and at the end I was blamed by many as the one that started it.

I started a new school after that in a “small class”, lack of a english equalent name for it, basicly a group of outcasts or “special” kids, my problem was of course the social damage and bullying, at least on this school I wasn’t bullied or attacked everyday, it was calmer and I never had any major incidents like that of the other school, teasing and bullying was less frequent and I was not openly attacked here so I had some social reformation, but at this time I felt safer being closer to grown ups so if I felt that tension was high I went to look for a teacher on patrol until it was time to go back to class.

at 4th grade I began in a “small class” for the older kids, 4th to 6th grade, it became a bit rougher then as the other classmates were a bit of the rougher kind and bad tension occurred now and then but never any major fights.

after 6th grade I was moved over to a School for kids with various problems, some of them was there for major problems like drugs or the general trouble maker that starts fights for no reason at all…

The school was at least directly social adjustable after each students needs, I got some help with regaining social trust and help developing to a more posetiveperson, later on after the years I had spent at that school I moved over to a specialised high school with less problematic students, basicly people who had learning disorders went to this school, I ended up there probably due to the social adjustments I needed to help me add some extra points to my general grades, The school was roughly 2 hours total including a combination of travel with train and subway.

The year I was to turn 18 I technicly graduated from that high school and after summer I had choosen to go to Adult Community School (I believe one can translate it as such) that fall I had my first panic attack and pretty much had them every night until i was given medication against it, the attacks I had back then was so intense that I was acctauly placed on the highest allowed dosage and they pretty much made me a walking zombie, I cumped in to everything, as I needed the income one gets when going to school I had to continue even though every day I was depressed, sleepy constantly and affraid of the next panic attack coming around the corner…

This kept on during my later studies as well and I still have panic attacks, but I stoped going to school when I was finally able to get economic support from the goverment, so these days I have a balanced medication that keeps me well enough to do less straining things and everything dosent feel like walking with lead weights on your shoulders.

So back to where we started with the pointing out that I don’t have a girlfriend, this is partialycause that I toke the stance when I was 19 that I would feel really bad having to burden someone I love with the problematics and hardship I endure in life, I am 26 now and so I have had panic attacks for 8 years now, It’s been rough now and again, but I believe I am now so stable that I can have a girlfriend, just hope I meet some nice girls to get to know

On that note I think I may have bored you enough or prehaps enlightend you, I wish you all a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

I just had a run of versus in L4D2, I ended up on a server with like 10-14 year olds, so childish language and one of them that seemed to be a real d-bag kept on being a little shit for most of the game, in the early stages I proved his team that acting an arse wasn’t in his best favor, they basically got like 8-10% of the way in before we ambushed them and ended it there, the match went on, and in the end the team I was on won by +600 points

Basically people, being a dunce and a easily raged person won’t make you a good team player or someone people want to play with in the long run.